your words don't translate and it's getting quite late.

Nothing better than as tiny amount of planning as possible, meeting up with a friend and having the whole day to spend time together! Let people think what they think, we don't care. We don't mind. We are brave and spontaneous, and we do everything just the way we want things to happen. With some garlic baguette and strawberries. And a very sudden rain shower. I'm going to miss that, at least for a couple of months. 


Because IT'S ONLY ONE MONTH LEFT. And oh dear God how much I love this place at the moment. How much I love these people. How much I'm going to miss my bed and my pianos and my brothers and my friends and my goddaughter and everything. It's not just all materialistic. I'll be okay, I'm still excited. 

you say good morning when it's midnight.

Coming up next (in approx. 30 minutes): <3

i wake up to your sunset.

I haven't been in weddings since I was a tiny girl, and I can't recall a thing from those celebrations. Tomorrow giving these overrated sessions the second chance, and even to my own surprise - I am reasonably excited. Being in the age that I could catch the flower bouquet if I wanted to, maybe weddings do have some of the glory in them. Not to mention that similarly as billion other viewers, I checked the ceremony of Kate Middleton and Prince William, and maybe they put the expectations too high. There's no way that I'm ever going to hear as beautiful music in these weddings as the boy choir sung in theirs. 


Regardless of the fact that I am wishing for something flawless and something incredibly beautiful, I am going to enjoy both the ceremony and the celebration as well as I can. Because my promise for the better new life holds. Better new life meaning changed perspective of the world; third eye that doesn't only face the problem but also sees through it. Observes the light at the end of the tunnel before anything else. Sends messages in the bottle with a real hope that someone finds them. 

from the moment that i met you, and each moment after that.

Sometimes you forget that the people you love but haven't seen in a while actually mean more to you than you thought they would. That was the most unclear sentence ever. Anyways, what I really meant to say is that those people with who you haven't hung out for a long time can be a lot nicer than what you expected. That when you finally meet up with them, you realize that you would have wanted to spend even more time together. Or that simply, you just love them so much. 


I have that moment every time with almost all of my friends - this year has been fairly good in the process of "keep your real friends close and stop spending time with the ones you don't care so much about". A day feels like forever, when you cannot be with them. A week, and the withdrawal symptoms start to flow in your body. A month, and you can't recall the face or the voice anymore as you wanted to. Compare this with the family statistics: a day "YES FINALLY SOME TIME ALONE!", a week and your energy level has risen up high, almost with the possibility to approach the skies because you seem so cheerful. And a month, "well, it's not that bad". 


Thank you, lovely, that you opened up my eyes one more time. I want to spend more time with you. And you. And some of those I haven't seen since... forever. 

i don't wanna waste the weekend.

I think a great mission for the next month would be stop checking the watch every other second. Time is NOW, and time is HERE. Time is everywhere, yet it is nowhere. Time doesn't matter to me, because it's TIME to be spontaneous and time to love, to exist and to breathe slowly in and out. I love my time as I love my life, and there is no way I could see happiness if I keep thinking about the clock all the time.

teach me to do the thing i cannot do / to kiss you.

Last week at work, and I'm in a serious need of second and third and fourth opinions and point of views. My own thoughts are getting ancient as they are repeating themselves over and over again. But what I like about this job is that history has turned into something pretty damn cool, and these so called society sciences fascinate me even more after this Summer. Maybe that's some defining decision in my conscious, which is yet to be revealed soon!


This Summer has definitely been one with revealing things about myself that I tried to cover from the rest of the world and from God; that I tried to avoid; and that I didn't know I had inside of me. A tiny amount of brave personality and a bit of a.... many other things. 

there's a light, there's a sun taking all shattered ones.

all we can do is keep breathing now.

I don't want to sit in front of this bloody damn computer, I want to go outside, and dance, and jump, and spin around. I want to meet people that I don't know, and people that I love. I want to bike until all I can see is a forest, and a lake, and go swimming with my best friend. I want to picnic, as if I had no hurry to go anywhere. I want to stay up so late that I can see the sunrise, and watch it until the morning turns into afternoon. I want to do the things I missed last year and the year before that, just because I claimed to be too busy, or because I did other things that didn't make me so happy, or because I felt like I was in agony. I had that post-agony period yesterday, it felt like everything's over, but it was so strange. I couldn't really describe the feeling with words. Now, all I want to do is to be happy, to show people how happy I am and to make that fucking new start. Because I'd love a fresh start. And I will. 


Let's just begin breathing slowly in and out. Repeat. Then I think I'll go and make my dreams come true (but I have to read the list before I remember.).

so fine.

I PASSED. That's all. Now is a good time to start life again.

you made a dream.

Many people say they don't care whether you are old or young, black or white, Asian or American, tall or short, fat or skinny, brunette or red-hair. The truth is, most of them do care. The truth is also that I don't, or I'm hardly trying not to. It's very easy to be beautiful, no matter where are your roots - but it all must come from the inside. The answer to your question is your personality.

Often, pictures say so much more than words. You are never too old, but be the best you can. Do everything you want to do. 

my dreams, my plans, my heart, my hands.

The most beautiful sentence in the whole world.